Musings of the silly doggie-muzzleface head

This post is deeply meaningful

2008-05-12T22:27:01Z

Damn it, Nook, you can't expect me to pay off your damned mortgage if you keep closing your damned store and not letting me sell you crap. Bells don't just magically grow on trees, you know. (slither tried to make me a bell tree once, but it failed.) Not that the upgraded expansions aren't going to be cool or anything, but seriously, that's like three times in one month.

STOP MAKING FUN OF MY BULBASAUR

2008-05-08T20:19:47Z

Nintendo Channel yay

2008-05-07T12:52:19Z

Wow, Disney Friends is an abomination unto God. Thank you, DS demo downloads!

Also, you can send in recommendations (with demographic questions to further focus said recommendation) for anything the Wii system stats claim you've played for more than one hour, so I went ahead and basically said that Guilty Gear XX Accent Core is the best game ever for hardcore gamers to play with friends rather than alone, so says a 25-year-old male.

I'm not sure whether that's supposed to be for generating buzz so other people might get my recommendation and give it a try or to refine my own recommendations in an Amazon-like "So you like Guilty Gear, eh? Well then try this..." sense, but in Accent Core's case, both would be equally awesome.

It burrrrns

2008-05-01T14:23:33Z

So apparently playing Oblivion for more than about half an hour makes my video card hotter than (insert furry reference here,) which I suppose would explain the whole "it runs fine at first but eventually things start getting glitchy" effect I was experiencing.

But come on, it's Oblivion. This is not a new game. Mercury (not shown: GeForce 7900 GT card) may or may not (probably not) be able to handle Crysis, but my last machine could freaking handle Oblivion. Granted, I might have added a couple texture-replacing mods since then, but I'm told that if those prove too much to handle, that's allegedly supposed to manifest itself immediately as stuttering/choppy performance and low framerate, not later as things-are-great-until-your-video-card-explodes.

yiffyraptor has already suggested compressed air-blasting the card just in case dust buildup is doing it, which doesn't seem like a bad idea, though I'll have to get more compressed air for that since apparently we're out and no one told me. Other than that, I'm open to advice from my more tech-savvy friends.

In case this helps, checking the temperature first thing upon logging in after the computer has been off for a while gave me a reading of about 45 C, but it was up to about 50 C (the threshold upon which Hardware Sensors Monitor 4.4 starts coloring the readout window yellow) within 5-10 minutes of random desktop/Firefox (no games) use. It's been on for hours as of when I write this but at absolutely no point was Oblivion (or any game) played, and the increase is either dramatically slower or has finally stabilized, but has done so at around 60 C (still yellow.) I'm no expert, but that seems high for idle non-game use (and I can recognize that yellow isn't a good color to be seeing on a white-yellow-red temperature scale,) which, when combined with what I said about how one would expect cranked-too-high settings/shiny new textures/etc. to cause immediate framerate issues rather than slow and gradual temperature issues, leads me to believe that I'm looking at some other problem. Dust seems like as good a guess as any for now, but again, input is welcome.

Quickly, hand over the Bells before the fuzz gets here

2008-04-29T12:32:01Z

You know, I'm alarmed with just how high the organized crime presence seems to be in my Animal Crossing: Wild World village. I mean, everyone knows about Tom Nook's unavoidable predatory loaning, but no one warned me about the guy who sometimes comes by and offers you completely unrefusable (it's a "But thou must!" choice) "accident insurance," which I believe should fit most people's definitions of a shakedown. I also just bought a classic wardrobe on the black market, and the game doesn't really even try to sugar-coat that one. You have a very obviously shifty guy who visits town and throws up a tent once a week, requires a speakeasy-like password system to be allowed inside his tent, urged me to proceed with haste when I was signing the contract to become a member in case authorities arrived (hence the title of this post,) price-gouges like a maniac (we're talking double Tom Nook's price or more, not counting the membership fee,) and is widely known to sell paintings that later turn out to be forgeries when you try to resell them or donate them to the museum. This man could not be a more obvious fence if he wore clothing with a white picket pattern, which I could probably design at the Able Sisters' tailoring shop if I wanted to except that I spent pretty much every last Bell I have getting that wardrobe.

I guess that's what you get when the only authority figures in the entire village appear to be an elderly mayor who only so much as visits the town every great now and then, and two sentries whose jurisdiction seems to consist entirely of that one door they're guarding.

And yes, it was important enough that I acquire a wardrobe that day that I got the one that was about 6,000 more than it would have been at Nook's and is probably hot. The only wardrobe I've ever seen at Nook's before was an absolutely hideous-looking cabana-themed bamboo one and he certainly didn't have any wardrobes at all on that day, and the classic wardrobe was actually really pretty and fit my room design really nicely, and I didn't want to wait for however long it would take for that same one to happen to randomly appear again.

(This is dr_dos' cue to give me the address to that Billy vs. Camp AC:WW LP again because I lost it)

Nintendo Wii: The GENERIC DUDES' turf!

2008-04-23T01:01:54Z

I love you, Virtual Console.

It's that time again!

2008-04-21T11:51:57Z

Since it's kind of been a while since I mentioned this and anyone I friended recently might have missed it, and since I just made a couple posts, I figure it's time once again to point out that I have an opt-in sex filter for my sexy posts. It started out as a place for me to put my TMI stuff but it's now sort of evolving into the place to be for porn in general. The last couple posts have things like naughty commissions and Oblivion screenshots!

If you go to my main journal page and the entry immediately before this one is "The Lizard Returns," then you're not in it. If there are two "[Sex Filter]" entries between that and this, then you are in. Lucky you!

If you're not in and you'd like to be, or you are in and you want out, reply and I'll be happy to take care of that! Replies are screened in this and all opt-in posts so you can say "YES I'D LIKE THE HOT TEO ACTION" without your friends knowing, though they aren't in the actual filtered posts themselves, so watch out.

Also, I promise that all my sex filter entries always have and always will open with an immediate LJ cut, so I'm not going to turn your entire friend page NSFW beyond the word "Sex" in the entry titles. They all look like this:

Subject: [Sex Filter] blahblahblah
Entry: cocks

So you have nothing to fear!

The lizard returns

2008-04-19T22:07:41Z

I AM WEAK, and therefore, I just got all the Oblivion expansion stuff. Like, all of it. I used Amazon (Super Saver Shipping because I'm cheap, but hey) to get Shivering Isles and that Knights of the Nine box that includes every downloadable expansion except Fighter's Stronghold, and then I downloaded Fighter's Stronghold from the official site. (So, currently I have Fighter's Stronghold but nothing else, but I think I will hold off on playing until the other stuff arrives so that can install it all at once, including the official and unofficial patches.)

THE GAY ARGONIAN RIDES AGAIN

I guess it says something good about this game that I loved it so much that my main complaint was that it ended when it was over and I had no other quest lines to do (rather than something blatantly out-of-character like joining the Dark Brotherhood.) I guess expansions are the perfect thing for "I don't want this game to be over yet," aren't they?

Endless Ocean + Playlist

2008-04-17T05:11:08Z

I was complaining to slither about games like Persona 3, Radiata Stories, and Bully, where they present you with what appears at first glance to be a vast and sprawling environment you can explore and interact with, but then impose restrictions that prevent you from really realizing that. (Bully has a huge school where you can find stuff to see everywhere except no you can't or you'll be late to class; Radiata Stories has a huge sprawling town filled with interesting non-generic/cloned NPCs who all have their own schedules and everything--the atmosphere is alive enough that I'm actually slightly excited/nervous to be in the seedy part of town at night--only every time you go to bed it furthers the plot and kicks you out of town and you can't go back until way later; Persona 3 has a town you can explore and people you can talk to everywhere, only you can only do one thing per day and you have an imposed maximum of one game year to beat the game.) Basically, nothing irritates me more than games that give you vast explorable environments and then don't let you explore them.

So, no sooner did I figure out that that's what I disliked and explained it to Slither like that than I suddenly realized, "Hey, I wonder if Endless Ocean is any good." Since, you know, that's basically the entire point of the game.

So yes. I'm only about 30 minutes in now so I'm sure this is premature, but it seems pretty cool in that regard so far. It's also relaxing to the point of being hypnotic. One problem I have, though, is that the music is beautiful but it doesn't seem to play underwater, which is more or less the entire point of the game, isn't it? D: I don't want to spend hours and hours ~~masturbating~~ petting sharks and stuff if all I get to hear is my own SCUBA sound effects like 2001 or 7 Days a Skeptic or something.

Fortunately, the game claims to be able to play MP3s off an SD card. I am certainly capable of putting a playlist together, if that's what it's going to take. You know I love power metal, but the point of this game seems to be soothing casual exploration, so I think the ballads and slower, more melodic "pretty" songs are the way to go. So, how does this look to you as far as playlists go?

Also, if there's anything here you haven't heard before, I highly recommend checking the links out, as they are all super pretty. I think it's almost completely impossible to dislike pretty power metal ballads--the closest to a negative I've ever heard was "Normally I go for the harder stuff, but these are certainly nice as well" and some particular song-specific criticisms (Windmill is absolutely nothing like Helloween has done before or since and is just too out there, Last Drop Falls has some rather uncomfortable lyrics, etc.)

And if any of you know more good tunes along these lines, let me know, of course.

Anyway, the list:

Angra -- Sprouts of Time (Temple of Shadows)
Avantasia -- Cry Just a Littla (The Scarecrow)
Avantasia -- Farewell (The Metal Opera, Part I)
Avantasia -- What Kind of Love (The Scarecrow)
Blind Guardian -- The Bard's Song (in the Forest) (Somewhere Far Beyond)
Blind Guardian -- A Past and Future Secret (Imaginations From the Other Side)
Blind Guardian -- Skalds and Shadows (A Twist in the Myth)
Edguy -- Painting on the Wall (Mandrake)
Hammerfall -- Never, Ever (Chapter V: Unbent, Unbowed, Unbroken) (I don't know why the video has a picture of Glory to the Brave for the visual. The song is really from Chapter V.)
Helloween -- Windmill (Chameleon)
Kamelot -- Abandoned (The Black Halo)
Kamelot -- Don't You Cry (Karma)
Rhapsody of Fire feat. Christopher Lee -- Magic of the Wizard's Dream (Magic of the Wizard's Dream [single])
Sonata Arctica -- Last Drop Falls (Silence)
Sonata Arctica -- The Misery (Winterheart's Guild)
Sonata Arctica -- Tallulah (Silence)
Symphony X -- Candlelight Fantasia (The Divine Wings of Tragedy)
Symphony X -- Communion and the Oracle (V - The New Mythology Suite)
Symphony X -- Paradise Lost (Paradise Lost)

kjorteo @ 2008-04-14T11:04:00

2008-04-14T17:05:52Z

Happy birthday to mr_silvers! May his floof be floofy.

And also me :o

New icons

2008-04-11T21:06:24Z

This is quickly turning into the most important LiveJournal ever.

I make too many Smash Bros posts

2008-04-11T06:23:27Z

Kjorteo's official "Fuck this stage" (Tier 1) list:

* Mushroomy Kingdom
* PictoChat
* Skyworld
* WarioWare, Inc.

Kjorteo's official "No, seriously, fuck this stage and fuck anyone who actually likes it" (Tier 2) list:

* All of the sample stage builder stages
* Flat Zone 2
* Rumble Falls

And just to be at least slightly positive, some stages I actually like:

* Battlefield
* Delfino Plaza
* Distant Planet
* Frigate Orpheon
* Smashville

SAUR

2008-04-09T22:56:25Z

http://xane.gamez-interactive.de/Brawl/Decrypter/ (thanks ravenworks)

Some random freeware plugs

2008-04-09T18:10:57Z

The problem with the open-source community is that it is often alarmingly pompous and loud. Hell, the fact that there even is a community is usually troubling enough. I want programs that can do the things I want them to with no hassle, preferably for free. I don't want to be part of a community.

That being said, though, there are some surprisingly neat freeware programs out there if you just try to ignore the people who get all uppity about them. The thing I like, though, is that they can replace the programs you'd otherwise have to pirate, if you're the kind of person who feels bad about that sort of thing. Which probably none of you are. Given the choice between 1) Paying lots of money for a legitimate license for a popular commercial program, 2) pirating said popular commercial program, or 3) finding a no-strings-attached guiltless freeware alternative, most of you will probably happily go for 2. Well, I like option 3 when the replacement does everything I would have needed the commercial program to do, so let me at least make some recommendations!

(Disclaimer: Some of these are open-source, some aren't but they're still freeware. I really don't care enough about the distinction between the two--that's the open-source community's job. I just like programs that replace commercial programs without requiring money.)

Operating System: ... :(
Unfortunately, I've got nothing here, because free operating systems suck. I mean, there's Linux, but...eeurgh. I'm happy to say that I have legit copies of Windows for both my machines (purchased XP Pro for the tower, the laptop came with Vista Ultimate.) I'm not really comfortable with software piracy when it can be avoided, so I do feel better having actually paid for Windows, but money or piracy are pretty much your choices here, since Linux is horrible. They claim that Ubuntu is supposed to be designed around "Hey, what if we made Linux such that actual human beings could use it?" but I'm still skeptical.

Web browsing: Mozilla Firefox
One of the many areas in which the community is noisy enough that it's hard to just use a decent browser without making it sound like I'm trying to make some sort of statement. Maybe it will help if I at least concede the bad points: Firefox is a total unrepentant memory hog, and not all websites designed with IE in mind work properly. (Although this seems to be in the process of being fixed, as I'm finding less and less sites I have to give up and use IE for these days.) Plus, it's not exactly the free alternative to commercial/pirated software, since anyone who has Windows has a free copy of IE, which as of IE7 has tabbed browsing and most of the other cool features Firefox mostly got attention for having first. It does still have its advantages, though! It's slightly (the degree of this is highly exaggerated, but it's still at least a little) more secure with things like ActiveX and such. And the good news about having such a rabid community is that the extensions are amazing. Yes, IE7 supports plugins, too, but the sheer number of really good add-ons for Firefox that people have actually bothered to make is staggering.

E-mail and newsgroups: Mozilla Thunderbird
Well, it's pretty much Outlook Express only it seems to work slightly better. Plus, it has one of those trainable adaptive junk mail filters, which is awesome.

Image editing: GIMP
This one might not be to everyone's tastes, since image editors seem to be a highly personal thing, and it's hard to switch from one to another after finally getting a handle of where everything is. Heck, I know someone who still uses Paint Shop Pro 5 (they're up to 13 now, I think) because they pretty much broke it in the new versions and all the other editors are confusing after getting too used to PSP. So, this might not be for everyone. Still, if you're willing to give it a try, GIMP does everything that you or I would need it to do, and it's free. If you're a professional graphics designer, then no, but at that point you can probably just view the $900 PhotoShop license as a legitimate business expense anyway. For mortals, GIMP is just fine. Its help file is an abomination unto God, but its community is excited enough that there are tutorials everywhere. If you get it, just remember that your help file is called Google, and that one is excellent. "How do I (whatever) in GIMP" is guaranteed to bring up at least 20 different results. Just, whatever you do, don't get the GIMPshop plugin. Its whole "We rearranged GIMP to make it look more like PhotoShop so people can more easily get used to the change" basically boils down to just making one big window it forces all the individual GIMP windows into, and it doesn't even work very well. (It doesn't de-clutter the taskbar at all, and it's incredibly buggy and prone to making GIMP itself behave erratically and/or crash.)

Image viewing: XnView
Another one that sort of strays a little from my stated goal of recommending freeware alternatives to commercial programs, this is basically Windows Picture & Fax only with more features and less bugs. (Plus it can view more formats, too, like PSD.) I'm only recommending it here because it fits so nicely next to the image editor, and because XnView is really that awesome.

Archive management: IzArc
WinRAR is probably the most pirated program out of all the ones I'm discussing today, since the thought process is so automatic. I need to read .rar files, so it's time to get WinRAR. I don't want to pay because being able to read .rar files is a God-given right, so it's time to get a crack. However, the other side to that is that it's such a basic thing that it's surprisingly easy to replace. IzArc is a freeware program that reads .rars and whatever else WinRAR can do. IzArc = WinRAR but free. What more do you need to hear?

Text editing, spreadsheets, etc.: OpenOffice.org
This one actually surprised me. First off, it has to be one of the more alarmingly pretentious freeware programs this side of Linux and the Firefox community. Heck, they love themselves so much that they put their website name entirely, including the .org, into the actual program name. It really is called OpenOffice.org. When you download and install it, it tries to install it in C:\Program Files\OpenOffice.org before you change it. Really. (You'll never guess where you can download it from, by the way.) Still, pretending for a moment that this isn't about some sort of counterculture community affiliation and I just want to do what Microsoft Office can do without having to pay $400 for it, OpenOffice(.org!!) is amazingly, almost miraculously good. It... it is Office. Granted, I haven't had it for very long, so there's a chance I could run into some obscure feature it doesn't have eventually, but for now, it's just about identical. The biggest change I've had to put up with so far is getting used to the new names for the individual programs. (Microsoft Word = OpenOffice.org Writer; Microsoft PowerPoint = OpenOffice.org Impress; Microsoft Excel = OpenOffice.org...Calc?) Once I was in the right program, the layout was spot-on. Even the menu layout and all associated options are practically identical! I will note that Writer, while still having the auto-spellcheck and associated squiggly red underline of doom, does not appear to have the auto-grammar check and associated squiggly green underline of doom. Of course, if the ability to fight with a program that can't figure out your perfectly legitimate sentence and blames you for it is worth $400 to you, then, well....

Movie recommendations?

2008-04-07T09:43:02Z

All right, in slightly more important news, I need to know how Sweeney Todd is.

See, I'm kind of torn on whether I want to see it. On one hand, when I saw the trailers and stuff, it was like, "ehhh, no." Sure, it's Tim Burton and Johnny Depp, but so was Edward Scissorhands, and I hated Edward Scissorhands. (Ed Wood is awesome, though.) Plus, I hate musicals.

On the other hand, everyone I know has been going on about how awesome it is. If it was just yiffyraptor then it wouldn't count (he likes everything, so the Yiffy Seal of Approval has lost its much of its economic standing due to excessive inflation) but it's...like...everyone, including people whose recommendations I actually take seriously. Then again, everyone else loved Edward Scissorhands, too. :(

I had a chance to see it a couple days ago, but I just couldn't muster the necessary excitement, so I used the "hey I'm visiting a friend and watching a movie" time to see Clerks II instead. No regrets there even if Sweeney Todd is awesome, because Clerks II was incredible and I'm glad I got to see it. We also made plans to go through the rest of Kevin Smith's work sometime, since there are only three movies of his either of us have seen (Clerks, now Clerks II, and Dogma) but we each really liked all of them, so now we're intrigued.

So basically, I had zero interest in Sweeney Todd at first, but if enough of you tell me I should see it, I guess I'll have to believe you..

Incredibly pointless post

2008-04-07T08:33:04Z

I liked Better Days more when it was ~~hot incest porn~~ character/relationship-driven stories. It got really dumb when Fisk joined the army and it basically turned into Rambo, but I haven't stopped reading yet because sometimes Fisk gets shore leave and they can actually do something with the other characters again.

I'm fairly certain I disapprove of this whole sudden "Your dad was actually an undercover CIA operative and this is now Metal Gear Solid 2," though.

I MADE KJORTEO UP

2008-04-01T06:26:13Z

Yes, I confess. There is no such person as kjorteo. I came up with the "Kjorteo" character and have been masquerading as 'him' by writing and managing all of 'his' LiveJournal entries, AIM conversations, etc.

I mostly did this for mooching purposes; I could get cheap sympathy every time I was 'depressed' because 'he' and I had a fight, and also get a bunch of people to draw really nice pictures of 'him' which were given to 'him.' Oh, and thank you very much for whatever present you got 'him' for 'his' birthday, but now that my birthday is coming up...you get the idea.

I'm sorry if I had any of you people fooled. It was a prank that went too far and now it's out of control and this is the only way to stop it. :(

New laptop

2008-03-27T04:28:29Z

Meet Quicksilver.

Yaaaaaaay :D

Due to irritating financial constraints that mostly boil down to "This is a $2200 order and I only have a $700 credit limit :(" my parents picked it up for me and I will now have to start paying them back. Which I'm good for. It's not the first time this has happened (they bought Mercury, my desktop tower, and I successfully paid them back for that, and my being relatively good at this is why they were even willing to go through it again) so all is well, I think, except that money is suddenly :( even moreso than usual and will remain so for the foreseeable future.

I also bought it one of these in advance, because not having one while using it in the weaving room while weaving with all that fuzz and all is extraordinarily cruel and unusual punishment for a brand new machine whose only crime is having an HD-DVD drive.

Yay games

2008-03-27T02:14:35Z

"Reserve your copy [of Pokemon Mystery Dungeon 2] today and receive the Explorer's Guide, an exclusive collection of info, interviews, and an original manga by Ken Sugimori.

*Deposit maybe [sic] required. See Retailer for details. Available while supplies last."

Wait what

:O

Oh, I am getting the hell in on this.

GameStop doesn't appear to be obeying that promotion, though. Amazon does, though, so yay!

Now, which do I want, Time or Darkness?

Oh, okay. Darkness it is.

And in other news--feralmuse might be excited to hear this one!--Chocobo's Magical Dress-Up is, at least according to Wikipedia, coming sometime Q3 2008.

Now all I need is Etrian Odyssey 2 to hit and I'll be set for games. Set.

kjorteo @ 2008-03-21T14:33:00

2008-03-21T20:34:18Z

The Smash Bros. Brawl OST is basically Your Childhood: The Soundtrack.

It's also sixteen hours long, so maybe trying to put it on for my weaving music for today was somewhat ill-thought-out.

Edit 1: Six hours in, ten to go. Nominating the F-Zero section of the Brawl OST for weirdest, or at least most distinct songs. I swear I went from full-fledged death metal (with bwaaaaahhh lyrics and everything) to blatant raver techno within two tracks.

Edit 2: About ten minutes after edit 1. Fire Emblem music is pretty. Main Theme [Fire Emblem] probably my single favorite song so far.

Edit 3: Almost seven hours in, nine to go. Forget what I said in edit 2, Power-Hungry Fool [Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance] is my new favorite. HARPSICHORD <3

Edit 4: About three or four songs after edit 3. It's a prettified remix of the pre-"okay now you're in Winters for real" Winters theme! (Like, when you're in Snow Wood Boarding Academy still.) Sooo pretty.... may be my new favorite now, but there's probably going to be six more of them before the night is done at this rate. :(

Edit 5: About 7:15 in. "Porky's Theme" and "Love Theme" are pretty and neat. TOO BAD I CAN'T PLAY THE GAME THEY'RE FROM :[

Edit 6: 7:45 or so in. Pikmin music is pretty. Like, this is soothing.

Edit 7: Eight and a half hours in, seven and a half to go. Over halfway there! Okay, so, Mona Pizza, then Mona Pizza again, then Mike, then Mike again, then Ashley, then Ashley again. It sure was generous to include both language versions of the WarioWare character songs and everything, but Christ, I think we can move on now.

Edit 8: Nine hours in. K. K. Slider's voice is...unusual, but I think I like it. All the Slider songs are amusing and thus entertaining. And on the subject of Pikmin-like soothing prettiness, that one piano Smashville song was absolutely beautiful.

Edit 9: Nine and a half hours in. Okay, they were really cute at first and I can still appreciate what they're trying to do on an intellectual level, but please make the K. K. Slider songs stop now. ._.

Edit 10: About ten seconds after writing edit 9. Saved by Kid Icarus! Hey, this is a pretty neat song.

Edit 11: Oh my God, I've been listening to this soundtrack for ten solid hours, and there are six hours to go.

Edit 12: 11:30 in; Snake/Shadow Moses Island music is neat.

Edit 13: Twelve hours in, four to go. Very tired. Strongly tempted to abort. However, I have work I need to get done anyway, and if I stop now, there's no way I'm coming this close again. I want to say I took this thing in one sitting, dangit. Metal Gear music is even more neat than before.

Edit 14: Oh hey, after only a mere twelve hours and 15 minutes, they're playing actual Smash Bros. Brawl music. So that's what the title theme sounds like!

Edit 15: About three songs after edit 14. So what, Sonic doesn't get remixes? I've been listening to fancy orchestrated versions of classic Nintendo tunes for the last twelve hours, and here we have four Sonic tunes that were pretty much just lifted straight from the Genesis and unceremoniously dumped into the soundtrack. The Genesis doesn't even have good sound!

Edit 16: 12:30 in. Oh, there we go. Wait...hold on. Is that Crush 40? Did they seriously put a Crush 40 song in the Sonic pile?

Edit 17: Thirteen hours in, three to go. I like how Sonic has absolutely nothing between the direct unmodified Genesis Green Hill Zone and the J-Rock. A lot of the latter was pretty cool, though, as sad as I'm sure it is for me to admit that.

Edit 18: Fourteen hours I want to die (music is excellent though, just energy crash)

Edit 19: 14:30 DK Rap Jesus Christ my ears

Edit 20: Holy shit, I did it. Remind me to never, ever, ever do that again. Damn it all, though, I did it. I'm going to bed now. And for the record, the last part of the album was pretty decent too, except for the DK Rap.

Smash Bros. meme

2008-03-19T18:30:19Z

Why not, I guess.

1.) Who is your primary character so far?
- Pokemon Trainer. I want to be the very best, like no one was before. Ivysaur is badass.

2.) Secondary?
- Meta Knight. HIYAYAYAYAYAYAYA

3.) Character just for fun, not competitive play?
- Actually, Pokemon Trainer and Meta Knight are the only ones I really ever play. I suppose the "I can at least appreciate the character design and think they seem neat" pile would include Mr. Game and Watch, though.

4.) Favorite series in which a character was used for Brawl?
- Pokemon.

5.) If you could add one character from another Nintendo game, who would it be?
- By Nintendo, do you mean first/second-party or just that it appeared on a Nintendo system? Totally Bub & Bob (either one or the other or maybe both like the Ice Climbers) if the latter. And...well, it's unoriginal by looking at everyone else who did this meme already, but Midna/Wolf Link is the best I can think of for the former.

6.) If you could add one character from any other video game ever, who would it be?
- Totally trying to think of who would actually make sense and not just picking Red XIII... must think of who would actually make sense and not just pick Red XIII... um... Bub & Bob if they weren't a valid answer for #5, otherwise Spyro.

7.) If you could add/change one thing about an existing character, what would it be?
- Everyone who's a clone (Fox/Falco/Wolf all have the freaking Landmaster, even--since when does Wolf have a Landmaster?) needs to be way diversified. Is it that hard to make people different? They made Luigi different enough, at least. :( Also, Yoshi's egg roll and Squirtle's hyper shell roll are a little too...suicide-y to be useful; that should probably be fixed.

8.) Coolest looking character?
- Ivysaur is the cutest and Charizard is pretty cool, but Meta Knight is a total unrivaled badass.

9.) Worst looking character?
- None of the Fire Emblem characters are ugly or anything, but they all look a little...same-y. I have trouble telling them apart, but probably because I haven't played them enough to appreciate whatever gameplay differences they might have. Also, I'm sure they did the best they could with Sonic, but unfortunately Sonic always looks ugly in 3D. It's just the design.

10.) Biggest let-down character?
- Can we vote for the cameos in the codecs/radio calls? I don't know what in God's name happened to Leon (voice and general demeanor,) but quite frankly, I'm scared. As far as actual playable characters, probably Wolf, just because I really didn't ask for a third blatant Fox clone. Again, Wolf has a Landmaster. Were they even trying? (Plus Leon is better anyway.)

11.) Cheapest' character?
- I'm sure it's only a matter of time before the stupidly hardcore people with way too much time on their hands find a small but exploitable glitch in some unlikely character that makes them the new tournament king. (I'm already seeing speculation about a wavedash-like trick Squirtle can allegedly do. Here's hoping nothing comes of it.) Ignoring the tournament scene and focusing more on my level, any character with an infinitely repeatable attack (like Meta Knight) on a stage with a vertical wall, anyone with a paper fan period, and anyone with that gun that shoots green long beams since it's so easy to literally juggle people all the way off the side of the screen. I want to complain about specific bullshit character moves, but I play Ivysaur. People who live in glass houses and all that.

12.) Best looking effects/weapons?
- I...never really payed attention enough to rank them?

13.) Favorite Final Smash?
- Favorite or best? I play Pokemon Trainer and Meta Knight, and it's hard to tell which I like better between Triple Finish and Galaxia Darkness. Both are neat, but neither are absolutely amazing. Even though I don't play him, I should probably give Olimar credit for this one. Some smashes you can get away from if you dodge the death beam or whatever, but if Olimar gets an End of Day off, you're fucked. Period. End of Day = End of Discussion.

14.) Dumbest Final Smash?
- Donkey Kong's has to be the easiest to avoid, and is pretty hilarious to just watch him embarrass himself if you're not caught in it. Well, okay, Meta Knight's is the easiest to avoid initially, but...still. At least you're still fucked if Meta Knight hits someone with the cape, even if it wasn't initially you.

15.) Best outfit?
- As much as I have bias toward the characters I actually play, I have to give this one to Jigglypuff's sun hat. It's just so outrageously stupid that it goes around the other way and becomes awesome again. Especially with his final smash. Giant sun hat!!

16.) Favorite stage?
- I don't really have any stages I particularly like. I do have ones I particularly hate, though. Basically, as long as it isn't one of the gigantic ones with safety walls everywhere (Hyrule Temple, Luigi's Mansion,) has infinite-rape-enabling and side-smash-disabling vertical walls (Shadow Moses Island, Onett,) or is WarioWare, Inc. (fuck WarioWare, Inc.), then I'm content.

17.) Favorite boss in the Subspace Emissary?
- Haven't gotten far enough in to judge.

18.) What did you think of the Subspace Emissary?
- Seems neat so far....

19.) Did you get it at midnight release?
- No, but Yiffy did and we live together, so I guess I basically did.

20.) Did you dress up as any of the characters?
- No.

21.) Did you get a Japanese Wii and game to play it early?
- No.

22.) Do you use the Wiimote or the Gamecube controllers?
- What kind of bullshit question is this? Classic controller! Classic controller!! Heathens.

23.) Are you sad that "wave dashing" is gone?
- I hate the tournament-level Smash Bros. community because they take a goofy party game (it's basically comparable to Mario Kart as a fighting game--skill is involved, but so are items and hazards and shit) and trying to wring out the hardcore frame data and basically turn it into something it's not. Just play Guilty Gear, you lunatics. Anyway, any change made to the game specifically to spite them makes me happy.

kjorteo @ 2008-03-15T17:46:00

2008-03-15T23:48:52Z

Attention everyone who has Smash Bros:

If you haven't seen it already, win a match with Pokemon Trainer and have Ivysaur specifically out when the match ends. I don't care if you've never played Pokemon Trainer before or you hate him or something, just do a random bullshit match vs. one CPU on the lowest setting with "look at you the wrong way and I go flying way the hell off the screen" lightness turned on if you have to; just win with Ivysaur.

The body-surf thing he does in the results screen is the best animation in the game.

This was lifted from an IM conversation, but is true enough to paraphrase and post anyway

2008-03-14T17:21:43Z

So here I am, hours after writing a post about how cool Pokémon Trainer is in Smash Bros. I'm finally sitting down to work, and am listening to the Pokémon Mystery Dungeon soundtrack as my choice of weaving music for now. And it just randomly occurred to me that I still need to just sit down and beat Pokémon Diamond--I mean, I'm at the last dungeon, sheesh. And oh God, Mystery Dungeon 2 is coming out as some point, I need to get on that.

I believe I'm in danger of having my license to be over the age of 14 revoked.

kjorteo @ 2008-03-14T06:21:00

2008-03-14T12:24:14Z

Upon further evaluation, it seems that Meta Knight is amazing at dealing random damage, but his moves seem to lack actual KO power. He can get people up to stupid% damage very easily but then still not be able to actually put them away, unless you forget trying to smash entirely and stick to edge-whoring, which is way beyond me at this point.

(Which means he's absolutely amazing in Subspace, where all you really have to do is deal damage, but by far my weaker character in actual real battles with other people where actually smashing them off the screen is a concern.)

Conversely, Pokemon Trainer is the very best, like no one was before.

kjorteo @ 2008-03-09T04:34:00

2008-03-09T10:52:50Z

Meta Knight is the man.

Kirby is like an inferior version of Meta Knight. He's just not cool enough to get a cool mask and sword. And he's pink. I mean, seriously.

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Edit: Never trust a raptor. Brawl code is 4897 5597 9383